When Life Goes Sideways

This morning I helped a young man who had accidentally locked himself out of his apartment. He was leaving the house in order to head to work and, as I’m sure many of us have done before (I know I have!), locked the door behind him without giving it a second thought. 

It’s not like he didn’t have a backup key–he did–but the friends who had it were out of town and, despite our best efforts, we were never able to locate it at their house. His landlord is located out of town, and the local maintenance person for the building had a key, but it didn’t open his apartment. So, on to calling locksmiths…who weren’t open yet. When we got a hold of the first locksmith, they wanted $140 to open this young man’s apartment for him. This was a little rich for his (and my!) blood. FINALLY, a local locksmith was able to help him out for a very reasonable rate.

Suffice it to say, my morning was not at all like I had planned. But then again, life rarely is. The alarm you thought you set doesn’t go off. The “shortcut” you thought you were taking to work ends up taking longer than the usual way. You get sick. You get lost. You get double-booked. Whatever it is, in some way or in some form, the apple cart will eventually get upended. And when it does, a lot of times we shut down. Or lash out. Or start connecting random dots that are completely unrelated but since we’re looking for someone to blame for things getting twist-turned upside down it all makes sense (i.e. “if I hadn’t sent that text message this morning to my friend, I wouldn’t have been late to that one corner, and if I hadn’t been late to that one corner, I wouldn’t have tried the shortcut that ended up being a longer route”).

At times like these, our identity as people of faith usually goes out the window. Sure, we might call upon the name of the Lord to make a traffic light turn green more quickly, or to somehow make our bosses later to work than we are, but we don’t often think our faith can be of any service to us in times like these. But what if we’re wrong? What if our faith is exactly what we need when life goes sideways?

Fr. Richard Rohr says, “Faith is not for overcoming obstacles; it is for experiencing them—all the way through!” In other words, the purpose of faith has never been to make our problems or our obstacles disappear. It’s not magic and it was never meant to be. Our faith helps us experience the obstacles without explaining them away or connecting dots that aren’t connected, or finding someone or something that is to blame for our plans going sideways.

The truth, Jacqui Lewis reminds us, is that there is something for us right where we are no matter where we are–IF we let it all play through. She writes, “Right where you are, in the hurt and sorrow, that’s right where the insight is, that’s where the answer is, that’s where the wisdom is. The transformation is there, the rebirth is there. And you’re not alone.” That’s wisdom I hadn’t planned on receiving today, but there it is. Wisdom is here–no matter where “here” is. Faith helps us stay “here” long enough to realize it. 

So, friends, if your day started out like mine–a little sideways, a little off script, or came at you a little out of left field, HAVE FAITH. Not abracadabra faith that will make it all go away, but the kind of faith that lets you experience your obstacle all the way through, trusting that wherever you are is right where God is.

On the sideways journey with you,
Pr. Melissa

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